Nadine and I wanted to make our triumphant return to blogging with a
nonfiction novella about that awkwardly lovable right-handed bat from Texas with no first names, Hunter Pence. How could he not be an instant Phillie fan favorite? The old-fashioned socks, the wit, the appetite,
the Cliff Lee hooking him up with cowboy boots. Swoon! He's pretty much the anti-Werth outside of the right-handed bat thing. That no longer rings true for Werth, as his batting average hasn't helped anything but
bar prices since he took that
long walk to DC. But every time I plan on writing a post about a Phillie that isn't Kyle Kendrick or go to a game that Kyle Kendrick isn't pitching at, I am a total jinx. Sure, Pence singled last night after striking out three times, but I still managed to mess up that nice statistic about the Phillies winning whenever Pence hits. So let's save that goofy gangletron for another day, talk about why I couldn't sleep after last night's loss, and then go eat.
Let us first reflect on
the Great Doctor and Cy Young Collector Harry Leroy "Roy" Halladay III. The same question is probably on everyone's mind whenever Doc goes into the ninth. While he's especially good at getting out of jams and pitching a quick and efficient nine innings, maybe Charlie should let the relief pitchers work every now and then. While Doc has proven us all wrong
before, and it's awesome when he does, last night's loss to the D-Bags was especially rough knowing that in addition to neck tattoos, the D-Bags also lead the league in
comebacks. Last night marked their 35th of the season. Doc also had his first extra-base hit
ever in addition to pitching a solid game which did not help my mood. Instead, it made me reminisce on that postseason no-hitter he also had a hit in. Memories. I guess losses are just tougher on nights when you feel the Roy Halladay magic.
That brings me to my second point about them late innings bats. Tuesday's bottom of the ninth was difficult to watch: one out, runner in scoring position, and Ross Gload and J-Roll strikeout. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that the Harry Kalas statue was also revealed last night or that I haven't been won over by Gload yet or that I had one too many beers, but before he even got up to bat, an old mantra popped into my head, "
In case of emergency, use Stairs." Matt Stairs' home run was the last Harry the K called in 2009, and while Stairs was released from the Nats earlier this year, I wanted him to fly in then and there to save the day. That, or I wanted John Mayberry Jr. to be pinch hitting instead of pinch running.
You could replay Tuesday night's game a lot of different ways to make yourself feel better. At the end of the night, the next morning, and the next day, it's still just baseball — at least until the clock strikes 7:05 PM. I guess it's best to just maintain the same attitude as a fan of baseball that Hunter Pence does as a recent addition to the best team in baseball. “This is nice,”
Pence said, “but I definitely don’t know what I did to deserve this.”
Let's go eat.
